Just got a call from Shore Office, ” Captain don’t take tomorrow’s flight, the crew change is cancelled. The ship is getting handed over to a new management in China”
Ha ha ha ha ha !
Messaged mom downstairs (I know they won’t be able to sleep cause I’m going 😏), she sent me a message with a smiley-“ok good 😊” -this is huge hA hA hA hA hA !
Crew cut: check
(I’m packing as if I’m going on a painting expedition 😂.
Did I already mention tht my credit card is authorised finally! Keep the MacBooks ready Singapore!)
All said and done I can say that I have never done things by half measure. I did not only symbolically say that I’ll be there for them, I had actually quit my job and come back. But if they didn’t meet me even less than halfway it’s not my fault….wonder if they will realise? A man can do only so much.
But why do I still want them to be happy with me? Is it because I have no one else?
I wonder if I was so nervous the last time I joined
News! Found $400 in my foreign currency pouch 😁
Also found an old wallet. We’re in business now.
I need to purchase a MacBook Pro. Was thinking of purchasing duty free at Singapore but I guess will have to do from onboard once I get some cash. ✌🏼 (Unless I find a valid Citibank Card in one of my briefcases/certificate files- that will be amazing 😁).
Ok so I had dropped my wallet at the Airport right when the vacation trip has started. The card that arrived was for the bank account that I closed. So I am without any cards. And I doubt if I have any foreign currency with me. I had exchanged all during one of the low cash periods in my first year. 😐
In the morning my throat had swollen so much that I thought I’d choke. Then I thought of a distant future where this is a real possibility. No one would even come to know.
I have not discussed or even mentioned my imminent departure with Mom. I want to write, “I wish you knew how lonely and sad I was. Lonely not for some female partner but for my parents who seem to be on a different planet where I’m married with kids. Wish there was empathy in you.” But I know it’s not even worth writing to her. Because for her cowards leave behind letters. The brave face every situation.
Did I say 2 years and I seem to have forgotten everything. But then I joined after a gap of 3 years the last time and got my sealegs back in no time. But then this time I’m not studying at all. Tying up the last moment School stuff.
Yeah. So I’m flying to Singapore on the 28th. I hope it gets at least a couple of days delayed. I hate sailing and going away as I said. But I’m trying to remind myself to enjoy and let it be fun. Try being a real sailor for once.
I messaged VD that I didn’t like the way he ended things. He replied he was sorry and that he’s like to begin afresh. I said I didn’t care for that because he was in a different city now and we might never meet.
Sex 3 times a year and each time some reminder. This time sore throat. Fuckity Fuck. I should stop having sex altogether. Look for some other means of salvation.
The Secret Diary of J. Alfred Prufrock 